I had a hard time with it, for so many varying reasons; from curiosity to disgust, to disbelief. Not that I didn’t believe Kai, I did. My issue with it all was I couldn’t reconcile how the man who created, in my opinion, one of the strongest, strategic thinking, complex, female character’s who carried an entire “universe” for almost a decade could be “that guy”. And it wasn’t just the character of Buffy, but almost all of the female characters on that show were kick ass, strong women.
And I now had to separate the man from his art, which was/is hard because he made sure it was so entwined.
In my process of doing this I also let my nosy curiosity take over and the sleuth in me started to wonder…who was the “beautiful, needy, aggressive young” woman on the set of Buffy that he had an affair with? And then I proceed to give it far too much thought; so of course I have to share my speculations in order of probability*:
Note: I am going to rule out Kristine Sutherland and Robia Brett LaMorte as they are around Joss’ age
That would not be an affair it would be child molestation.
Michelle was a young teen when she joined Buffy in Season 5 and she did a LOT of whining back then and screaming and she was just…ugh. But “ugh” in a way that little sisters are “ugh” so we loved her anyway and for that reason alone and the threat of jail time I think is a big no go zone!
Sarah had been around Hollywood/New York Entertainment scene since she was a young child, she knew what was up and she was not playing that. She was a sought after actress so she did not need to be validated by a first time TV showrunner.
Also, Joss may be a pig but he is obvi not stupid enough to risk getting his ass handed to him by a woman who knew Tae Kwon Do and could put a stake through the heart of his show by walking away if he crossed the line.
While beautiful, she is not aggressive and also too self aware and smart to be manipulated by Joss’ power. Now that I know who he is, she would intimidate him and she has far to many physical similarities to his wife. But the biggest reason Alyson can’t be the affair women is he wouldn’t risk her talking about it in one of her “Band Camp” stories.
She was originally my first suspect, only because she went from Buffy to Angel and I thought Joss may have “favoured” her.
But I ruled her out because she is/was very secure in her sexuality and didn’t strike me as “needy”. And while all of these women are forces Charisma packs an extra punch and would eat Joss alive and not break a nail.
She definitely fits the beautiful description, I can’t really see Joss attempting to manipulate her. And while she wasn’t as known prior to her role as Anya and within a good age range at the time, I find it highly unlikely due to other “evidence”. Also, after playing an ex-revenge demon for so long she probably picked up a few tricks that would scare him off.
I think we have a winner here folks and I will state my case.
She was young, beautiful and experiencing her sexuality for the first time away from home. There is also a story where Joss felt the need to do a “career intervention” with her because she was doing too many horror movies (SMG was doing the same at the time, but received no such attention) and thus Dollhouse became their project.
She was missing from the 20th Anniversary reunion that included Wesley who was a far less important character on Buffy. And according to Kai, Joss had already confessed to her at this point about the affair as they had been secretly separated for sometime. Could the decision not to include her have been to keep the peace?
I also noticed how over sexualized Eliza’s characters were in Buffy, Angel and Dollhouse – almost like he was leaving Easter eggs that he wanted us to find. Like the creepy Mayor/Faith relationship storyline…ew.
Last point, Eliza has a thing for older men, gorgeous, delectable older men. So Joss fits part of that MO being…well …older.
Also if I look back to Eliza then (not now) I think she was a prime target for him. She was just legal and starting her career as an adult which an idiot would say that is needy, her outgoing personality could be misinterpreted by an insecure male as aggressive and there is no denying she is beautiful.
What do you think?
*Please note: This is just me sharing my crazy random thoughts on this. I understand these are real people involved with real feelings and my intention is not to hurt them. I did this to make light of what a lot of people are wondering when it comes to the affair revelation.
Who he actually had an affair with is none of my business, and honestly if it is or isn’t one of these women it doesn’t effect how much I love them or their work on the show. As far as anyone knows he could have had an affair with the caterer.
I also applaud these women for not making any public statements about this. I don’t see it as protecting him, I see it as protecting each other and the legacy of strong women they built together. This post was purely for entertainment purposes.