Rant: Cyclists are back on the road…Great!

CyclistIt’s that time of year when the cyclist break out their bikes and hit the road. I am all for saving the environment, and being fit or just enjoying the ride…but most of these “road cyclists” are f’n idiots!

You are on a bike stupid! The only protection you have from my METAL car is your PLASTIC and FOAM helmet…yes you have every right to be riding your bike and I wouldn’t mind sharing the road with you if you obeyed the f’n rules of it!

Just like I have to be aware of the cars around me…so do you! Just because you are on a bike it does not give you a free pass to do whatever you want like swerve out to change lanes without checking and then get pissed off that I am there and almost hit you. LOOK FIRST! Signal your intentions! I have to look AND signal before I change lanes, SO DO YOU!

Red Lights and Stop Signs ARE NOT OPTIONAL! YOU HAVE TO STOP! Not slow down and breeze through. Oh, and for those cyclists that DO stop my car is not for you to LEAN against ASSHOLE and don’t get all offended when I tell you to get the F*$# off it!

And to the asshole this morning who decided to hit my car with his hand because he felt I was too close to the gutter (as I was making a right turn) and he wanted to go through a RED LIGHT. You are so F*$#ing lucky that I am pregnant, because you would be in the hospital right now from me first kicking then shoving your bike up your ass!

The “joys” of being pregnant

2013-01-17 14.10.25Before I hop right into my topic – a topic there was no room for in my last post; I have to put it out there that, NO, I am not going to become one of those women who obsessively talks about their kids or my pregnancy. Because I am more than a walking, talking, weeble wobble of an incubator, and after the baby is born I will continue to be more than just a Mom. And if I do become one of those women…PLEASE CALL ME ON IT! I will thank you for it!

Oh where to begin with this? Maybe I should start by giving an obscene gesture to all those women I know who have had kids but kept all this from me! A little heads up would have been nice ladies, ya know, before there was no going back. Was I THAT closed off to you during your pregnancies that I just didn’t hear it or is there a secret society that forgot to send me my membership card and get me to pledge an oath of silence? Because there was SOOO much about this whole experience that would have been nice to know beforehand.

I am fully aware that not every pregnancy is the same. I was somewhat aware of that fact before since I had a few friends who got knocked up and they all “handled it” differently.

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It’s a baby!

It's a babySo, the cat’s outta the bag… I’m pregnant, and decided to find out the sex of the baby. Which apparently on your first go around is a no no. Which brings me to….

I’ve learned a lot during this life experience but today I am going to share a  few recent “lessons”.  First, the above mentioned one.

It seems there is some unspoken rule that you shouldn’t find out the sex of your baby the first time around. That part of the “joy” of pregnancy is the SURPRISE at the end when you learn if it’s a boy or a girl. (I put joy in quotes for a VERY good reason which I promise to explain in my next post).  I call BS!

Something else I learned is that it is extremely wrong of me to hope for one sex over the other. That I should just wish for a healthy baby. I once again call BS!

Another lesson is EVERYONE seems to think they can touch your belly when they feel like it or weigh in on your choice of names…uh let me think about that for a second…No.

So let me start with the first lesson:

It seems a lot of people had an “issue” with me knowing the sex, since it’s my first child and I don’t understand this. Whether this is my first child or my fifth, last time I checked in was MY child (and my husbands). I’m the one preparing for this child and my personality dictates that I need to plan, plan and plan some more. It causes me anxiety when I know a big event is coming up and I am not prepared. And folks this is a HUGE event. My entire life is going to be turned upside down and inside out and I NEED to hold on to any fragment of control I have left. And if that fragment of control is knowing the difference between choosing blue or pink for a blanket I’ll freaking take it! Not only that but,  I also was REALLY stressing out over it, because I can admit I was not in the market for a girl. Which brings me to my next “lesson”.

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